Monday, August 13, 2007

A Bluffer's Guide to the Football Season

YOU know the feeling.
It's the soccer season again. And you're not that into it.
You might be into some other sport - personally, I can't wait for the Rugby World Cup - or you might not be into sport at all.
But for the next few weeks, just until people start complaining about how much soccer there is on television - everyone's full of it.
So here are a few key phrases which you can thrown into conversations about soccer and which will give the impression you actually know something about the game.
(If you have any more, do let me know.)

✖ You’d have to say, all credit to the lads.
✖ They got a result.
✖ But it’s still early doors.

✖ The ball was just millimetres away from being inch perfect.
✖ If it had gone into the net, it would have been a goal.
✖ Sadly, it was on his left peg.
✖ He has an educated right peg.
✖ At the end of the day, our boys won because they wanted it more.
✖ It’s been a step up for them.
✖ They’re prepared to take it to the next level.
✖ They had their backs to the wall.
✖ They gave it 110 per cent.
✖ Obviously like.
✖ They had bouncebackability.
✖ Put the ball in the onion sack.
✖ The lad done good.
✖ They're a one-man team.
✖ It's a team game.
✖ Between the sticks.
✖ One for the record books.
✖ We’ll take each game as it comes.
✖ At the end of the day.
✖ If we play within ourselves, we’ll be over the moon.
✖ I mean like you know.

Please apply the above to any match you like in the coming season.
But careful, don't name names.
Or you'll be caught out.

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